salam...

Masuk sudah minggu kedua kelas Fall berjalan-jalan. First of all, aku nak mintak maaf kepada junior2 kerana prasangka yang terbukti tidak betul. Hanya kerana mereka tidak mengucapkan terime kasih kat airport ari tuh bukanlah bermakna mereka kerek. Bile difikirkan balik, mungkin mereka kepenatan. Tak dapat berfikir panjang. Yang dipikirkan.. cume nak sampai ke bilik secepat mungkin dan pitam. Bile bebudak nih rajin datang melawat umah aku, baru aku sedar betapa meriahnye bile datang junior2 nih. Selama nih.. terase juger keseorangan... Aku tak kesah sangat kalau derang datang nak tumpang masak. Lagi aku suke adela.. lagi2 kalau bawak ayam skali. Tak payah aku beli lauk dah... So, pengajarannye, dont ever..ever.. judge somebody from his or her appearances. Get to know them, talk to them. InshaAllah, hubungan tuh akan terbentuk sedikit demi sedikit. But.. ade la a couple of students yang tak bape suke nak bercampur or lebih teruk.. sudi nak menegur. Even kat masjid, duduk sebelah2 pun taknak bersalam. Aku rase muke aku nih dah cukup melayu dah untuk dikenali. Takdela plak pernah aku dye rambut aku nih kaler merah ker biru ker... Ego? bukan.. kalau ego mungkin aku. Ego as a senior. I do expect them to start the conversation. I do want to test their knowledge about taaruf (konsep berkenalan dalam Islam). But until now.. not even a mimic...

I have to admit that this semester has come to the Red Level stage, where my economy is at its worst ever. I have a negative checking account, and therefore i was charged for every transaction i made. And the charges are not low.. $30 per withdrawal. Multiply it by 3.8 and you will know that you are in big trouble. I was not aware of that negative value as at that time i was far away from reaching any ATM machine by the name of my bank. And thus, i neglected the need to check the balances (as it will be charged like $3 if i use other ATM machine). So, i thought that i was right and i kept swiping my credit card until the balances went far below zero... Oh yeah... that was just right. And now i am doomed. Moreover, next allowance is one month away... So, in these 2 weeks, i have been eating rice and ikan bilis and drink plain water. Only when the juniors are nice and considerable, i'll get to eat something sweeter :D Worst ever... I'm studying without textbooks and using only half of my last semester note pad for 4 subjects... This is indeed the worst situation ever... Im keeping myself away from these problems and try to focus in my studies, but yet.. these problems are big problems and they need solutions as soon as possible. Generally, i am in a deep depression. I keep on smiling but it will not go for long...

But...

I am really happy that my family is always there for me. As an 'along', I try my best not to cry for help. I do not have enough experiences and this is my weakness. Therefore, i will take this as a lesson and remind my youger brothers and sister not to repeat what i have done wrong in my life.....

wassalam...

Posted by Ahmad Fadzli on September 9, 2003 at 5:45:00 AM | Permalink